Best self

This post has been rolling around in my head for days. They are the thoughts that keep me up at night. Bouncing thoughts around. I am a woman who is trying to do her best. There I said it. Sometimes my heart is not fully committed to what I am doing and that is because I probably should not be doing it in the first place. Now I am not talking about smoking or bleaching clothes for spite. It's just that some things that I do are not completely in my nature. Not part of me. Do you know what I mean? For example getting up at a decent hour in the morning. I know I should but my body is not wired for that. From day one I have been a night owl, plus I function better on lots of sleep. My bedtime has improved greatly, it is now no later than midnight. Still, this whole thing bugs me. I want to get up and be more productive. There has to be compromise. There is going to be compromise. Lately I have been writing down goals, dreams, and inspirations. I write so many things that it feels overwhelming and I just stop. This past year has taught me that the freer I am the better I do. If I have a huge to do list I feel lifeless, but if I have a few important things to do I feel empowered. Freedom has been on my mind a lot. A lot. The freedom I crave is not absolute wildness, it is freedom of choice, freedom from guilt, freedom from judgement, freedom to live how I want to live. Tonight I took a long, hot bath. My ideas of life swirled in my heart and my body relaxed. When I was out and in my soft clothes, I started writing. The question that I wrote was "How can I become my best self?" This is what followed:

* Do what I say I am going to do
* Set realistic goals
* Push myself through the hard parts
* Love God, my family, and myself
* Treat myself kindly
* No limits
* Positive vibes, thoughts, and actions
* Let yourself be free
* Nurture the self that IS into my best self
* Follow your heart
* Know that I am capable of great things
* Know that I deserve great things

This is a wonderful place to start.